Twenty five cents for brains is pretty cheap, unless of course you're a zombie. Not that zombies may not have any money, they just lack the coherence to count the coin, plus if they can't turn door handles then I'm fairly certain they lack the dexterity to pull coins out of the coin pocket on their jeans. Don't think they can drive either so the above is fairly useless to them. Plus they're zombies for chrisaskes, they will look to eat your brains for free.
"But there's no such thing as a zombie Stu" I hear you say,
"I beg to differ" I respond
Let us assess the current state of affairs by doing a simple google search for recent zombie like attacks, prepare to become very worried...
- May 27th, 2012 - Man eating victims face shot dead by police.
- June 6th, 2012 - Miami man tries to bite police officer and smashes head against wall.
- June 21st, 2012 - Man bites off chunk of mans arm.
- June 38th, 2012 - Man bites wife's left ear off.
- July 11th, 2012 - Man (naked) climbs on roof, bites home owner and cop
- 14th July, 2012 - Man bites off part of another man's ear
That's a small selection from a 7 week period, I could go on and on. So I say to you my friends that the zombie apocalypse is here and with us now. Don't look to the future, the time to act is now. You'll need pick axes, shotguns, cross bow (or normal bow if you're a really good shot) and shovels. Form moderately sized defensive groups and try to find some sort of compound like accommodation, preferably with towers. Some land for growing food would be useful too.
When attacked by a zombie remember to always aim for the head and always double tap ... I'm serious about that ... always double tap.
The good news, for us, is that zombies actually prefer dogs. Not such good news for dogs.
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