TAXI CAB CONFESSIONS # 4

I used to drive a taxi/cab. Why? I often ask myself that, it was a shitty job, but it got me through 2 years of university, so it served a purpose. I was telling a few stories from those days to a friend recently and it got me thinking that I should write these stories down before I forget them.

We've got a situation here

"Alright son?"
"Hey hey"

In they jump, 3 likely 'lads' who it turns out are in Australia for a 6 month holiday.

"Joondalup thanks mate"

English tourists love to say 'mate' in their best attempt at an Aussie accent. A bit like when we get over there and start callin everyone 'governah'.

Nice guys, we start chatting about stuff, we hit the Mitchell Freeway north, towards Joondalup, a suburb that seems to be home to 3/4 of the ex pat English population of Perth.

My radio crackles to life, "Driver alarm, Mitchell Freeway north near Vincent St overpass"

Shit, this means a cabbie is in trouble and he's just up the road in front of me. Even though I knew very few other cabbies, it's an unwritten rule that you ALWAYS look after your own. Good to know this when you're driving dodgy idiots home at 3am, (not these guys, but plenty of others). There is however another rule of sorts, you don't enter into an area of potential danger with a fare on board, it's not their problem and you shouldn't be exposing them to any sort of danger. Duty of care and all that!

I take a look at the 3 big guys in my cab, yeah right, like I'd be exposing them to any danger HA!
"Hey listen fellas, we've got a cabbie in trouble up ahead, I gotta help him out, but if you guys don't want to be involved we can keep going"

"No fucking way" is the response "Lets get in there"

Excellent!!

Seconds later and there it is, a white cab in the emergency lane, motionless. We pull up behind it, I think the guys were out of the cab quicker than me!

I reach the drivers door, he's slumped back in his seat, I open the door and I'm greeted with a face covered in blood that's also dripping all over the front of his shirt, broken nose at least. Damn, it aint pretty and he aint well!!

You so don't want to see this shit, it could always be you. He isn't in a good way. One of the guys yells out "Where did he go"

The cabbie raises an arm and points down the embankment towards Herdsman Lake. "Three of them he splutters" But there's no way we're gonna find them down there.

I reach into the cab and grab the drivers radio, "base this is cab ### "I'm at the call on the Mitchell Freeway, we're gonna need an ambulance here and quickly". Base responds with a "sure thing". By now other cabs have arrived and plenty of them, good to see the "rule" is still functioning!

Most of the cabs don't have fares so I gather my guys up and leave the hurt cabbie in good hands, besides, if I hang around then the cops are gonna want a statement, then you become a witness and what can I tell anyone...

"When I got there he looked like he had kissed the front of a train your honour, it wasn't good"
Nah just let em say numerous other cabs attended the scene.

I don't know what happened to the low-lifes who decided that skipping a fare wasn't enough, they had to inflict pain as well. Karma will sort em out.

I got the 'lads' to Joondalup and now they have a travel story to tell their mates!

Edit: The police traced one of the guys who did the bashing to England, last I heard they were trying to extradite him. Good job

You can read the other stories in the series so far by clicking the taxi label below

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